Working outside the home

This happens every once in awhile. A very well meaning friend will suggest that our financial struggle can be eliminated if I just got a job. I think this happens because most of our closest friends don't have children and don't think about the costs involved in working outside the home.

I don't think it's a bad thing that this comes up, it always gives me an opportunity to reevaluate what I already know, the costs are too high. So yesterday I was told that I could do this if I want to. This is, of course, assuming that the kids were put into the government indoctrination system.

Here is what I came up with:
The costs for daycare after school and school holidays $12,000-$15,000 per year
The costs for a second car including the payment, insurance, gas, and maintenance $8,000 per year
The costs for appropriate clothing and supplies for the kids $1,000 per year
The costs for work clothing for me $500 per year
The costs of increased medical premiums and copayments since we are currently on a plan that has the premiums determined by income $4,000
The costs of increased taxes $4,000
The costs of more prepackaged foods for lunch and dinner $2,600

Assuming I could find a job making $30,000 per year, the grand total that we would add to our current income is -$2100. That's right it would cost me to work! That's not even counting the costs that aren't monetary. So could I work outside the home? Sure but the costs would put us in a worse financial situation not a better one.

So for the sake of argument let's consider all those non-monetary costs:
The kids would have maybe 2 hours a day with their parents
Lorna's medical condition requires her to take a steroid medication which suppresses her immune system, how many times a year would she end up in the hospital? From past experience when she was in daycare, twice a year. That's not even counting how often she got sick and didn't require hospitalization.
How would Malachi deal with being in a classroom, he has a difficult time now because he spends much of his time in his own little world.
Who would do the laundry and clean the house? Who would take care of the animals? When would I have time to cook?
I could go on but I think you get the point.

I do not have the ability to be a wife, mother, and worker. Something has to suffer and it would be the first two because if you let the worker part suffer you lose your job. So how is working outside the home going to solve our problem? It isn't. In fact I think it would just cause that many more problems.

So thanks to the friend you brought this up! You have helped me to remember why I quit working in the first place.